End of a Relationship

The end of a relationship may not necessarily be permanent. It is possibly the beginning of other things, such as new knowledge of what kinds of prospective lovers to avoid or the motivation to finally take up a new hobby, one that was not suitable because you were dating. Or it could reverse and you find yourself back in the warm embrace of your ex.

For a relationship that does not work out for major reasons, such as how your partner obviously had no intention on committing to the relationship, or something major, such as how your partner married you purely for the money, then you may want to consider ending the relationship. Such issues present an almost irresolvable situation and it would be better for both of you, or at least you, if the relationship ended.

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However, you would want to consider a proper time to end the relationship. Would it be best to end it when your partner is also sighing and lamenting about your relationship? Is it better to wait until your life is stabilized first, such as settling down in a new job or letting the children finish elementary school first? Would it be better to discuss with your family first, then come home and break the bad news to your partner? Or is it better to just fight it out now and decide between you two to break up?

Consider against ending it with a big argument, however. When your relationship is ended poorly, the feelings of anger and frustration might be carried on into the future and you remember your relationship as one of hatred instead, forgetting the wonderful experiences you had and how beautiful it is to have someone by your side. If you two decide to end the relationship, consider doing it in a calm environment with a logical mind frame.

If you two have decided to break up and will not change your decision anymore, then there are a number of things for you two to consider as you end the relationship.

End the relationship honourably. If you are the one who wants to end the relationship, do it with your words. Do not antagonise your partner to get the suggestion to break up and avoid being the one who instigated it. Do not go a roundabout way or deceive your partner into initiating the break up. Your partner may not want the break up and making your partner the scapegoat actually makes you the guilty one. Be honest towards your partner and made your decision clear. Trickery would leave both of you frustrated with the relationship you two have just ended.

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Personally initiate the break up. It hurts even more to be the one who has to hurt someone, and the feeling can be horrible. To avoid this, you might want to tell your partner to break up via a phone call, an email, or even a text message, any method that would help you avoid meeting your partner in person. You would be able to avoid seeing your partner’s sadness, you could hide your own sadness, and you could avoid having to deal with your partner’s pleas. However, this defeats the purpose of a proper break up. It would almost become a one-way break up where you make the decision without giving your partner a chance. It would also deny you a chance to decide for the very last time whether your relationship truly cannot be saved.

Be honest with your reason for ending the relationship. You need to tell your partner exactly why your relationship should end and that you two need to find someone else. It would give your partner a proper understanding of what is happening in your relationship and you would not lie to yourself the main reason for the break up of the relationship. It would be difficult, but ending it with some other reason may see your partner acting in a different outcome. For females, lying that they are interested in another guy could result in their ex boyfriends doing things as drastic as becoming a playboy or suicide. If that is your actual reason, though, you might need more than just the truth to help you break the bad news.

Regardless whether you really wish to end your relationship or not, do try to make a logical and sound decision. A relationship can greatly affect your life and staying with the wrong person could result in an undesirable outcome. Yet, it is only after you have lost your loved one that you realize it was a mistake.

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